Tag Archives: God
On asking and wishing
Posted on 07. Jul, 2010 by maryanne.
This is from a piece of artwork that was on the wall where we stayed in Colorado last week. It stopped me in my tracks on more than one occasion. I am familiar with this verse from Matthew 7: 7-8. Too familiar, I think. Some truths are spoken or read so many times that we forget their validity and value. As I pondered this idea of asking, I began to try to ask God for things in my own life. After a few words, I stalled out. “Father, will you …?”, and then silence. My heart grew quiet and I began to question my motives. Religious voices moved in. Thoughts of what I “should” ask for trumped the gentle voice of my spirit. I quickly moved on to something else, knowing I would have to come back to this.
That very same day, in our explorations of a nearby resort, we came upon a fountain. Chris smiled at me and handed me a coin. “Make a wish”. I took the coin, not even thinking about it and faced the pool. ” I wish…”, and again, nothing. The waters in my own heart too murky to know what to ask for. I immediately connected it to the moment in front of the scripture on the wall earlier in the day. This asking/wishing thing was getting much more complicated than it should have been. I could not merely toss in a coin and breathe out desires at the same time. It seemed too much was at stake.
I think. Hmm, I think. ( too much). God cares for our hearts, our desires. We however, are in the business of trying to please Him. How much joy does it bring us to give to our own children? What if one of my kids came up to me and said, “Mom, I really would like some lunch, but I realize you are so busy and that bread costs a lot, and there are so many people in the earth that are hungry. So Mom, could we forget my original question and sit and pray for those who are hungry?” Kind of ridiculous. My heart would leap at being able to meet a need or a desire of one of my kids. They don’t have to think through it for me first. I am the mom. Yet, we do this to God all the time. We steal His pleasure by being over-religious. We decide for Him what is acceptable for us to have, rather than just throwing it out there. Why?
- Asking requires risk. What if we put it out there and God tells us no? What if we reveal our hearts and God ignores us? What if we search our hearts and don’t find anything worthwhile there?
- Asking requires that we know our own hearts. Most of us don’t know what we really want. This requires time. Time alone with God, the Holy Spirit who searches and knows the hearts of us all. We have to allow the silence to reveal the desires that move through the hallways of our inmost being. I believe God places those desires there like hidden treasure, just so He can leap at the chance to meet them when we surrender them up to His Holy Hands. He is our greatest advocate and lover of our souls.
- Asking requires us to relinquish control. When we choose to let go of the reigns of our lives and ask God for help, joy, relief, that new pair of shoes or whatever it is our hearts desire, we admit that we cannot do it alone. We admit that only He can satisfy us. That He will bring rest to our restlessness and discontent if we risk it all and breathe out our inquiries, and toss the coin.
“You have made known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand.” ~ Psalm 16:11
Tossing my coin soon…
Add your comment...
Bad Eggs
Posted on 05. May, 2010 by maryanne.
Recently I found nearly two cartons of eggs in my refrigerator that were past their expiration date. After having stomach issues with bad bacteria, I don’t play around with the possibility of bad food, as much as it pains my husband to throw food away. I told Katie we were going to throw them out and left the kitchen. When I returned a few moments later, she had a sharpie out, labeling them. She was marking them with the things she wanted to throw out of her life. I loved the idea and joined her. Soon after, Chris joined in the activity. Frankly, there weren’t enough eggs to symbolize all of these undesirables, but we hit the highlights including: fear, guilt, condemnation, anxiety and pain. You know, the big ones. Then we took them out back and threw them into the woods, listening for a splat as they hit the trees. (Many of mine were duds, as I am not much of an athlete).
I loved this activity. We all have things we don’t want in our lives, and every day we endeavor to “work out our salvation” (Philippians 2:12 NIV) as we allow God to redeem and heal the difficult places in our hearts. Knowing God does not mean that our lives are instantly transformed into pure bliss. It does mean that we do not have to go it alone, as we have an Advocate in the Creator of all things to partner with us. He heals and makes all things new as He walks with us and fills us with Himself. It is a process. Sometimes just knowing that makes life doable. We are in process, but in the Hands of our Maker. ” Know that the Lord Himself is God; it is He who made us, and not we ourselves”.( Psalm 100:3 NAS). That takes the pressure off.
I think He stood there with us as we threw those bad eggs into the darkness. He may have thrown a few Himself. Pretty sure His made a splat.
Guess I need to go to the store now…
Add your comment...
Post Rain Glory
Posted on 29. Oct, 2009 by maryanne.
It rained here all day on Tuesday. I mean rained. It was a down kind of day and I felt in a fog myself, so blah and numb in my spirit. I worked processing photos all day and went to bed just tired to my core. When I awoke yesterday, it was as if someone had turned on a light switch. I walked outside as the sun was just coming through the trees and could hear the previous day’s rain dripping from the trees. It was like grief was dripping off the leaves to reveal the brilliance of light and hope. There is something so magical that happens when water and light meet. I immediately put on my boots, grabbed my camera and two lenses, and headed down to the back pasture. It was like coming home. This is how I spent so many of my mornings in my early journey with photography, talking to God and capturing His glory, as best I could, with my camera. I could feel my spirit breathing and my heart enlarging as I talked with my Creator, telling Him how much I loved the goodness of His creation. He is so unique in how He does things. Amazing how many minute details show up early in the morning as the dew is still clinging to them. Even the little spider webs were visible. Our God is such a God of details.
Yeah, like coming home. It reminds me of this scripture ” weeping may remain for a night, but rejoicing comes in the morning” ~Psalm 30:5
I hope you enjoy the bits of glory that I was able to capture~
Add your comment...
Fresh Air
Posted on 29. Sep, 2009 by maryanne.
I admit it. Things have been tough lately. My son has been very sick for several weeks, first with a major colon infection for which he was hopitalized, and now with the flu. In addition, I have been sick for over a week with stomach issues, and it’s beginning to get to me. Today, I felt so bad, had a sick child at home and it was unbelievably beautiful outside. The juxtaposition of the brilliant sunshine and the gloomy indoors felt so frustrating to my artist’s heart.
Also, like most artists, I struggle with measuring my life by my accomplishments. When I am forced to slow down, ( and I continue to read every one else’s busy and exciting tweets), I often feel depressed. Anyone? Anyone at all? Hmm, I don’t think I’m alone on this one.
Anyway, while I was crying on the phone to my husband today, he encouraged me to get outside. I hesitantly took his advice. My three dogs, (also depressed I think), happily accompanied me to the back pasture where the sun was setting.
There, I found God. Why am I always so surprised to find Him in nature? He speaks through the setting sun, the flare on my lens, the playfulness of my dogs as they run circles around me, the strong oak tree that stretches over the path. It felt like He was whispering to me consistently, “p.s. I love you”. I needed to hear that so badly. Remembering that I had a pin at home saying just that, I decided to place it in key places that I felt God’s presence, and photograph it there, so I could remember. Yes, He loves me. I am so thankful. He loves you too.
