There are some days when the warfare is so intense it’s all I can do to be still. The battle within rages and I just want to DO something about it all, but don’t know how or where to start. The arrows fly straight into me, hitting their mark without fail. Grief, sadness and fear grip me. I often cannot see my way out on these days, but I have learned a few things that help. I thought I would share them if you have days like this too.
Just breathe. We cannot live without breathing. This moment will pass and so will the next, until we can get to a moment that feels doable again. When I lost a child in 2006 I had panic attacks around the clock. Chris would often hold me, coaching me to breathe in and out slowly until they would pass. I will never forget that.
Be kind to yourself. I don’t know where we got the idea that being hard on ourselves is a noble thing. It is in fact the opposite. Take a walk. Watch a funny show. Read scripture out loud (the words of life). Call a friend who loves you. Eat chocolate if you need to.
Don’t make any big decisions. This is an important one for me. When my perspective is wonky I cannot make any important decisions. i.e. “I am quitting my business” or ” I’m moving to California”. On these days I try to busy myself instead with feasible projects like ordering small spaces in my home or just doing laundry. Sometimes passing time and staying productive on a simple level is enough.
Pray. This one may seem like it should have been first, but I cannot always make it first on days like this. I just wanted to give you the same grace. Sometimes we have to level out a bit before we can pray like we want to. God is always present, full of love and compassion and ready to hear you. He loves you deeply and will give you what you need. Often we cannot feel his presence on the dark days. Call a friend who will help you if you need reminding that he is there. I needed this often during my grieving season. I had a friend who would just say over and over to me “God is with you”. I cannot express how much that meant to me.
Mercies will be new in the morning. So rest. I don’t know why these days come, but God will get you through.
Lamentations 3:22-23 ~”Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.”
Thank you….for sharing your feelings, your Godly and sisterly advice!
Thank you…for encouraging and knowing that you’re not alone in these seasons.
Thank you… for words that are comforting and soothing.
Thank you… for such creative and peaceful photos.
Thank you, Mary Anne, for being so real! It is so refreshing and encouraging….
Lovely, lovely, lovely. And so true. Oh, Mary Anne – I am so sorry you lost a child. That’s a piece of your story that I hadn’t picked up before. Each one of these is a helpful, wonderful, therapeutic and spiritually sound suggestion – thanks so much.
Thank you for reminding us to be kind to ourselves and reminding us that God is always with us. I also found it a helpful remembering that this time period where our mind might feel a little overwhelmed or heavy will indeed pass. God’s grace will come sweeping in as we learn to trust and rest in His arms during our storms.
So happy to hear from you again on here, Maryanne. I consider you one of my teachers sent from God at this point in my life this year.
Thank you Liza for stopping by and for your kind words. Blessings to you.
Diana, you always bless me when you read and comment on my posts.Thank you.
Lauren,
So sweet. Thank you for reading.
Nancy,
Love it when you comment. Thank you for reading my little posts.
I thought I recognized a kindred spirit in your writings, Mary Anne. My losses occurred in the 1980’s and 1990’s, but I remember the panic attacks and Ron holding me. Even though those attacks only lasted a short time for me, I am still learning the importance and blessing of being still to breathe, to be kind to myself, and to bring it all to my ever-present Strength and Comfort. Where would we be without Him?
Bless you for sharing and encouraging with your words and photos!
Beverley, I am sad that we have that in common, although I know the Lord has held you. Love your thoughts in your comments.
So needed this today!!!!!!
Oh thank you so much for sharing yet more of your heart. It’s by no ordinary stroll that I came across your beautiful picture of your horses and I was moved with so many emotions. I had to hope over to read the blog. Once again your heart echoes mine and we’ve never met. I am so sorry for your loss and understand I too have lost three children. The first in 2005, then 2007 and finally again in 2008. It’s crippling and the depression seems to always be lurking. Even with three wonderful sons here to see and hug, my heart aches to hug and hold the others. I have traveled my road alone as my husband does not and has never responded to the miscarriages. He said he didn’t know what to say. That might have hurt more than knowing my precious babies were lost to me for now. I try and take comfort in knowing they are with Jesus and that is a far better place. Thank you for the reminder that God is with me. <3
[…] This truth? So needed. […]
This is beautiful and so needed Mary Anne — I so relate and this has blessed me. Thank you for sharing.
and the people said…”Amen.”
Funny, I had one of those “just breathe” days yesterday. Must have said that a hundred times. Thank you for sharing……..
This is another instilation of the messages the Lord has given to me this past week as I have dealt with anxiety. Beautiful. Thank you!
RLP
Thank you, thank you, thank you for this simple but much needed reminder.
Thank you for your grace-filled words….I needed this reminder when I battle anxiety.
You are so welcome, Dolly. May God meet you in the hard places today.
Be kind to yourself….. yes. So hard. My believe was always: keep on going even though it’s gonna kill you.
But now I know that is not what God tells us. I’m learning the hard way, but I’m experiencing that His burden is soft.
Its Grace, in every way. Be kind to yourself. Yes.
Thank you. I needed your words in my process at this moment.
[…] One moment at a time, I need to take my own advice and breathe. […]